The John Cougar Mellencamps are Brooklyn Kickball's 2009 Champs!
Dont fret, Rachel, your day will come too. Photo by Koji Toyama
Sports Curses are stupid, as the Mighty Manny Ramirez and Yankee fans must agree, but they are real if the subject team feels it and believes it. Then, a curse becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. There is no doubt the John Cougar Mellencamps have always been one of the best teams in Brooklyn Kickball since their inception in 2006, advancing to the Finals that year, and losing in dramatic fashion to the NYC Fun Club. Elana said she cried for a week. Then, in 2007, the JCMs unfortunately had to pick the eventual Champion in their bracket, The Commitments, and lost the greatest game ever in extra innings. Then last year, after easily vanquishing the Commitments in the Semi-Finals, they still lost yet again to the Bacon Bits by one run with the tying runner on third.
The JCMs seemed the favorite all season long. The Bacon Bits beat them in an Opening Day rematch, but then they went on a season long, 22 game-winning streak, ending with 2 losses to Never Scared and the Dream Team on the regular season's penultimate day. Those results made the quest for the Chuck D. Cup an open and unpredictable contest.
The playoffs had almost no upsets, but there was plenty of intrigue and nail-biters. The only real shocker came during Division play, when Anubis squeaked out a 1-0 win over the Bacon Bits, essentially dethroning 2008's Champs. In the Quarter-Finals, every series went three games, and in every matchup except one, the Underdog claimed the first game. Diddy put the JCMs on the ropes, beating them in extra innings in Game One, and then as the home team, had the chance to kill the JCMs with a tie score in the bottom of the 5th. But Diddy couldn't register a run, the game went overtime again, and the JCMs emerged victorious in that game and the series. In a way, that was a blessing as the JCMs had a rough Saturday Night: Elana was hit by a car while bicycling, and the whole team waited all night long for her release from the hospital.
Meanwhile, Never Scared had their own drama. All season long they established themselves as a contender, beating every top team in the league except the Dream Team. But the Playoffs revealed their Achilles' heel (we all have one). During what should have been a routine win, the Wrecking Crew almost spoiled Never Scared's chances in a Division game, before ultimately defeating themselves with a missed peg at point black range by third base. Never Scared did advance by beating their top division rival, The Divine Sisterhood of the Sacred Bleeding Heart (their biggest foe being their name).
But Never Scared's biggest foe came the next week: Crucial Taunt. Now, I know people from both teams, and they are all good folk, but for whatever reason, Never Scared really wanted to kill them. They went so far as to make '"Beat Crucial Taunt'" T-Shirts for their anticipated match at the end of the regular season, but Crucial Taunt wanted no part of it, and didn't show. I knew they were not coming in advance, but the shirts were made, so I thought it would be funny if the Dream Team played them in Crucial Taunt's uniforms. But then the joke went south when Crucial Taunt would not comply. In fairness, the 2 rivals were scheduled earlier in the year, but Never Scared wanted to wait until season's end. Now, in the Quarters, the season was ending for someone. With John Starks watching near home plate on the Main Field, Crucial Taunt showed they were not scared either, and fucked Never Scared up the first game. But, as mentioned before, there was only one big upset these Playoffs, and Never Scared advanced to our rare Saturday Night Semi-Finals.
Of course the weather sucked, Saturday's rain rendered our field back to its usual swampy terrain. For the second straight week, our Chain Gang toiled and tilled the field, cleverly creating trenches and effectively draining the water out. Big Ups to the field crew. But most of the games were played somewhere between the Outhouse and the Monster, with home plate facing the Main, and outfielders creeping into the Main's infield. Most teams had logistical problems, so the evening went slowly. The New Fronts made a nightmare for the Dream Team in their 3rd game, eliminating them handily in an injury-riddled affair (a technical upset, but the Frontiersmen probably should not have been a 7 seed, my bad.). Then came a huge surprise: Brooklyn United, led by veteran first-baseman Justin '"Nipple'" Taylor, kicked the shit out the JCMs in their opening game. Scoring 8 in the first inning, we heard chants of '"Mercy-Rule!!'" and I don't believe they ever have been mercied. But it came damn close. However, this is why we now and will always have a series instead of just a one-game showdown. If you want to advance, prove you can win at least 2 games, and prevent flukes. Over 100 years of baseball history and wisdom must be right.
Meanwhile, just like during the regular season, Never Scared bested the New Frontiersmen in two straight games, finishing just before lights out. My account of that series is fuzzy, so I offer this G-Chat with 2008 Champion and MVP Karl Pawlewicz, now playing 3rd for Never Scared (and nobody does it better):
4:18 PM me: hey man
4:19 PM Karl: hey kev
sup?
4:20 PM me: please give me your recollection of your semi finals against the new fronts. i remember the 2nd game as tight, and they rallied a little, and lost by 1 or so before lights out. did you guuys come from behind?
4:21 PM Karl: as i remember it, yes. in the first game we won 7-6 with a walk off home run by paul. in the second game we came from being down 5-1 to tie, then go up by one, then go up by three. i think the final score in that 2nd game was 8-5
me: wow
thats unreal
4:22 PM Karl: what was unreal was the kick from paul. it landed inside of 2nd base on the main field i think. hard to tell cause i was running bases
me: nice
4:23 PM is it ok if i just cut and paste this for my playoff summary?
Karl: um, it's fine by me. i hope i've got the details right
4:24 PM me: hah, i will include that too.
Karl: word.
So there ya have it. Never Scared advances, but the JCMs win their 2nd game against Brooklyn United, needing to finish up their series the next day on Sunday. This is what I like: teams sleeping on it for one night. I only planned on 2, but going into the Final Day, 3 teams have a shot.
Some Joy in McCarren: Sunday, October 4th, Final Day of Brooklyn Kickball's 7th Season
I will always regret the day I mocked Elana over their first Finals loss. Some two years ago, she did something to annoy me, but I overreacted and taunted her over that fateful day. Since then, I showed sincerity and even openly rooted for the JCMs (some would say a no-no for a Commish, butfuck it). After they fell short again last year, just the two of us were alone on the Main, sharing a beer and a poignant moment.. I offered my condolences, and assured her that their day would come. Elana ended up winning the MVP award, a harbinger. But victory would not come without struggle
She wrote me mid-August, worrying about a scheduling conflict should Black Betty, her softball team, and the JCMs both participate in the Final Day. I did not deem her presumptuous; after all, Black Betty was on its way to a 4-peat, and the JCMs participated in 2 Finals. She really needed a catharsis from glory's tease, and I promised that there would no problems. But the softball game went late, and carried over into kickball's time. People were getting antsy, but I didn't care: Elana needed a favor. She wasn't playing softball, but she was supposed to be. And she was gonna play Kickball if we all had to wait an extra hour.
As expected, the resilient JCMs eliminated their Semi-Final Challenger, Brooklyn United, in routine fashion, 4-1. Now the stage was set for a crowd pleaser: JCMs, the perennial contender, versus Never Scared, a spirited team rolling about 10,000 deep. Their captain, Dan Clark, is treated like a Kurtz figure, and they MacGuyvered a pretty sick sound system, powered by a car battery. Both teams are fun and popular, and they split their regular season series. We expected a riveting evening, and the fates delivered.
Just as the sun set, the JCMs quickly mercied Never Scared in three innings. That never happened on a final night. "Line It Up!" Shirtless barked, which seemed to be a little much. Perhaps that lit a fire for Never Scared, because after they took the home field for game 2, they demonstrated a poise and resilience never before seen in our league. They claimed an early lead, and in the top of the 5th, came within a hair of snagging the win, clinging to a 1-0 lead. With 1 out and runners on first and third, we witnessed one of the greatest plays in Brooklyn Kickball history. The kicker drives a ground ball to the second baseman, who quickly tags the runner between first and second, then whips it to first for a rare, if unprecedented, true double play!! Game Over!! The only problem is that the best umpire in the league deemed the runner safe at first! So the run scored, and tied the game.
The contest lasted 7 extra-innings, 12 total for one game, 15 total in the series. Karl and Priest resumed their third base dual from last year's Finals. Just two great hot-cornermen, firing missiles and showing amazing field coverage and range. To me, all participants are Champs, and it was not the first time I felt that about the last 2 contenders. But only one can lease the Chuck D. Cup for a year, and the JCMs signed on the dotted line. Ultimately, in the top of the 12th, they brought 2 home, finally earning them the Title. Congratulations to them, and their deserving squad. Be ready to defend, and always try to at least look humble. Here is a slideshow of the players from both teams, photos by Alvaro Saavedra:
2009 John Cougar Mellencamps
2009 Never Scared
Shots from the 2009 Players Ball!
Pictures beautifully taken by Rachelle Mintz |
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We play every Sunday night at McCarren Park from 5 until the lights go off, usually around 11.
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